Shawn Huelle

untitled (answer)

Recently, I had the following conversation with a friend:

a screenshot from a mobile phone's messaging app. Me: "Most of it has disappeared now, and so I don't know what it was 'about,' but I was working in a Starbucks shaped like Kinko's and you came in. Thinking I would surprise you after not having seen each other for years, I snuck up to the counter while you were looking at the menu. When you ordered, still looking at the menu, I said, 'No. You can't have that.' Taken aback, you finally looked at me, but didn't recognize me. Rather than simply said, hey man, it's me, I escalated the 'surprise,' and grabbed your shirt across the counter. I watched the fabric twist, tornado-like, in my fist. Now awake, I understand better why, after you did finally recognize me, you weren't very excited to see me, but in the dream, assaulting you was supposed to be funny." Friend: "Ha! That's how you know it's a dream--is be stoked to see you regardless of any shirt-rending, my friend!" Friend: "I'd*" Me: ":))))" Friend: "And really, I shouldn't be ordering that venty Frappuccino xerox anyway. Bad for the system, variously. You were just looking out." Me: "I will write a poem called 'venti Frappuccino xerox'" Friend: "Nobel Committee, watch out!"

Now, I know I'm never going to win the Nobel Prize for my poetry (or at all), and I know my friend was being funny, but something about what they said stuck in my craw just a tiny little bit. I mean, the implication is that a poem entitled "venti frappuccino xerox" couldn't be a good poem, right? They're probably right, but that shouldn't stop us from trying. Here's my attempt. Feel free to send me yours.

venti frappuccino xerox

I tend to write not
poetry but what I think
poetry is which is not

poetry but just some
watered down whipped
up creamy caloric
wan froth facsimile
copy of copies

see the toner flaking
clear the next jam
and the next
jam

the German dub of Mel
Brooks’ Space Balls has someone
giving the order
to “Marmelade das Radar!”

my poetry
that joke jammed
into bad translation

Nobel Committee,
watch out!