Shawn Huelle

two dreams

I dreamt the felt pad on which I am sitting was different, included also a back pad, and that the halves were symmetrical. I decided, after many months I guess, to turn them around, and that what had originally been the butt pad was quite flattened, whereas the back pad was still fluffy. As I turned the whole thing around so as to sit on what had been the back pad, I thought, "I'm going to have to lower the seat fractionally."

***

I dreamt of moth larvae falling from the kitchen ceiling, falling onto my head, into my breakfast, onto the floor where I stepped on them and they popped. Even in real life, they seem like little more than pus-filled sacks, but how does a thing live or move without internal organs, nerves, muscles? If there were a being as much bigger than me than I am the larvae, it would think, when it squished me, that I was just a blood-filled sack, maybe a little crunchy.

One of the larvae grew very quickly, ate my whole breakfast, was suddenly sitting across the table from me, regarding me without eyes. I thought, it's hairier than I thought. I didn't want to look at its mouth when it spoke—a gurgling, infected sound.

Thanks for breakfast, it said. Breakfast? I don't even know what that means. Where did I learn that word? Anyway, thanks for the food. Listen, when you go to squash me— Wait, am I too big to be squashed now? I'm nearly the same size as you. I suppose I could, I mean, I feel this gland starting to work and there's this sticky filament and I feel as though I need to wrap myself up in it and I suppose I could wrap the both of us up. You wouldn't be able to squash me then. And who knows, maybe we'll change together. I feel as though I'm going to change. Am I going to change? Good gracious, why is everything moving so quickly? When I was small, I felt like I had a whole lifetime, but now. . . . What did you put in that breakfast? There's that word again. What did you put in that breakfast to make me grow so? I'm feeling a little light-headed, and that gland. Like I need to chew something around myself. How much do you like this chair? Do you want to come with me to sleep? I'm so tired. I think I ate too much. There used to be lots more like me. Do you know what happened to them? And I suppose I could wrap the both of us up. The both of us and this chair. These chairs. This kitchen. The filament is so soft. Don't you want to cuddle up in it with me?